Holy Hammacher.

Tucked between Lexington and Third Avenues on 57th Street in New York City is a very awesome funland called Hammacher Schlemmer. Now, when you say "Hammacher Schlemmer" I feel it's important you put your back into it, if you know what I mean. Say that with purpose (and a German accent if at all possible). It is a wonderful, all-inclusive retail environment where you'll find the best of everything and the coolest doo-dads. Things you totally need but had no idea.

present picks from HS:

source.

"The Million Germ Eliminating Travel Toothbrush Sanitizer"
Every time you return to your newly cleaned hotel room and realize you left your toothbrush out. You will never really know what the maids did with it while you were out shopping. The horror.
This is for that.

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"The Wind Defying Packable Umbrella"
Hands down the best umbrella ever; I need a second. When I moved to New York I was quickly impressed with the need for a sturdy umbrella or mine would constantly end up on the street corner every time it rained, with the other sad umbrella skeletons. I straight up used this thing as a shield at times and it withstood the challenge. Plus, it's pretty solid so when it's packed up I'm quite sure you could use it as a beating mechanism, so to speak.

source.

"The Jeweler's Steam Cleaner"
My jewelry looks awful and ruddy because I can never figure out a permanent cleaning solution (so so sad). So I just want to cut to the chase on this deal. What I know works is a steamer, because I'd always prefer to have my stuff cleaned at an actual Jewelry store. Though I'm sure this will end in many steam burns, having access to a steamer at all times would be very convenient. I can't handle another disappointment in this department so I hope it's awesome.

You never know what you'll find at your neighborhood Hammacher Schlemmer. Actually there's only one location plus the online store. It's a bit of an institution, having been in business since 1848; basically you should go there or at least play on the website. It's fun.


bye,
jayteewo.

I want Wednesday: jade/seafoam/mint edish.

Ya know, there's no excuse for me to ever miss an "I want" post. All I'm ever talking about is shit I want.. need. My apologies. Personal lives appear to have a direct affect blog production. 

Today I am doing a mint-themed "I want." What is it about that lovely tint of green that is a jade/seafoam/mint combo? You know the one. I always love that hue. Here are some of my favorite things recently discovered while obsessively scouring the internet for truly important products that I neither need nor can I afford. This is goin great. Enjoy. 

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I wasn't really buying into the whole "Maharaja slipper" trend (or whatever) until I came upon these little beauties, Martini Spike by Jeffrey Campbell. Dammit, Jeffrey, chill out with the sweet shoes. I can't keep up (nor can I guarantee I won't bust my ass almost immediately upon trying to walk in a pair of those massive McQueen-esque platforms.. more on that later).

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I need to say little to introduce seafoam Japanese Washi tape with tiny white polka dots. A nice array of decorative Washi tapes is the adult version of a sticker collection.

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I'm, whoa, way into colored skinny jeans. Since my obsession in general with skinny pants is really hangin in there, the addition of color is a nice change of pace (slight change). Especially those with a nice mid-rise, ya know, I like to keep that shit nice and conservative these days. While I really enjoy the J Brand fit better (more on that later), they do not have nearly as many colors as the Joe's Jeans version. Also, Joe's has like, six shades of green. The above picture is of Atlantic & Lily Pad, the two most jade/seafoam/mint-y ones. They have, holy cow, 55 colors total. Bonita :)

source.

This 'here comes the sun' print is really nice. It's been inspiring me to paint things with green skies and tonal works in the variety of green, too. Can't get enough. 

peace,

jayteewo.

I want Wednesday.

Dammit, I want so many things every day of the week. Craaaap. Right now this Deux Lux weekend bag is at the top of my list. Look how pretty the sequined base is! I love it. I think I need the black one because I like that it is basic in the sense that it is a neutral but has a dash of fancy to it with the sequins on the bottom portion. Shit, why the hell not? I wonder what the inside looks like. I would need a nice little getaway to use this, which of course, would hold only my shoes.

Speaking of, how about these kitten heel boots by Kickers? I'm not familiar with the brand but I think I'm into it. They're super cute, possibly to the point of unattractive. But don't worry, they circle back around to cute. Just my style.

later,

jayteewo.

Getting to know you.

When you are getting to know someone there are many methods by which to go about it. I was thinking recently that it is so intimate to share home videos or childhood photos with a new person in your life, whether they are of romantic or platonic interest. Showing someone photos/videos of your past is like trying to tell them who you are as a whole. There are things that can't be explained with words. Surely the above handsome little.. girl could not be explained with just words. It's risking the judgement or feeling safe enough with someone that you are comfortable revealing your whole self to them. Videos, particularly. "No, my face isn't crooked, it's just that my mom cut my bangs," or "yes, I've always had climber's legs." It's a relief to get to this step. Here I am, all of me, take it or leave it cuz it's all I've got.

meow, 

jayteewo.

6 Questions.

1. Who are these people who watch (I hardly want to credit it on my blog) 'Dancing with the Stars'? It looks like the stupidest show ever. I don't want to watch a professional dancer drag fat he-shes across a dance floor and then have theatrical heads say shit I don't care about.

2. Why don't miniature cats exist if miniature dogs do? This is just science, guys.

3. Do you ever really know a person?

4. Why do we have to work 8 (technically like 10 if we include commute and time for lunch that I have to spend away from home, not to mention getting ready) hours a day? Seems like a really large portion of our lives.

5. Like, I get how babies are made but, how are babies made?

6. How does a beard know not to take over your whole face?


best wishes,
jayteewo.

Halloween fun.

My birthday is around Halloween so growing up I really like that holiday the most. Birthday parties were more often than not Halloween-themed. It was (IS) awesome. Still into it. That's RIGHT! Would I turn my nose up at purple swirled Publix cupcakes with black cats on them circa '93 (standing in my driveway before school for a photo sesh wearing my new birthday coolots and sporting bangs that started halfway back my head)? NO.

Never fear, this tradition will continue into year 26. Oh my god, I am getting old. Now I'm going to have to drown my sorrows in sweet tea and candy corn. This year I'm going to have some girlfriends over for some light costumes, fare, and cocktails (mostly cocktails). Do I intend to include witch's brew? Why, yes, I do. Always have. Will I dress up as probably a cat or witch? Yes, but I haven't decided which (witch! ha). Will I play Hocus Pocus and Romeo & Juliet with Leo and Claire in the background all night? Yes. Hell yes I will.

As the adult woman that I am, I've made a project of finding some cute ways to participate in a costume party without getting carried away (and having an anxiety attack from all of the people staring at me while I'm at it).

This fantastical hand painted leather mask..

..paired with these fingerless paw gloves would make a sweet fox costume. 

This scraggly witch hat..

..and these striped tights would make a nice witch. I don't know why I always think witches must wear striped hosiery. I might use a vaccuum as my transportation à la Mary Sanderson.

That's all for now!


trick,
jayteewo.

Missing out.

Top 5 things I miss now that I have a normal schedule.

1. Milo. duh.
2. blog reading.
3. something I can't say online.
4. being generally lazy.
5. going to bed whenever I want (I hate going to bed early almost as much as I HATE getting up early).

I mostly feel bad for little Milo Sun. Since our love affair began, he's had all of my time. He's only five months old and we've been roommates for one, all of which we spent together. There was music. There was laughter. There were kisses. Oh, the kisses! So So many. Meow! I love him and he misses me when I leave him for 10 hours a day. Who can blame him for trying to scratch every square inch of my body?! He's just being a kitten, after all. And that whole 'waking me up at 5am EVERYday including the weekend' thing is totally endearing..

I'm still trying to get into a routine as far as blogging and self-care goes. I seriously need to get with it. Meal-planning would be an excellent idea, if I could only get motivated.

I miss my blog. I miss my free time. I miss my Milo Sun. So are the travesties of a 9-5 (830-530, who are these lucky 9-5 people?). Adjusting to a new routine after having a largely unstructured schedule for a while, can be grueling (can be, always is). Personally, I'm not into giving up my whole life to make ends meet (barely barely). It seems that the only enjoyable way of sacrificing all of your time is to be working toward a goal that is your own, but I guess I've always known that. "How do you plan to do that?" you are probably asking me in your mind. I'd answer that I don't quite know yet and I wish the frickin' idea would just come to me already, cuz I'm getting impatient over here. 

buenas noches,

jayteewo.

My week in Twitter.

I need to say little when also giving you the visual aid of my Twitter updates for the week. That said, I'm gonna Tarantino it and let you take the journey on your own.. mostly.

Gator pride and the end of the week. Regret over not letting Milo bite/scratch me to bits around 3am.. 4am.. 5am.. 

Also giving up on self care.

Milo is acting out. I'm trying to be patient.

Some pretty bold imperative statements here.

 Complain-y and germaphobic.

I do truly hate getting up early. It's like, no matter what time I go to bed, I still feel shitty in the morning.

bye,

jayteewo.

Saturdays.

Things I do on a Saturday:

1. Why are you reading this? You know I do the same thing on a Saturday as I do any other day of the week. I'm unemployed, you idiot.

2. But still, it is the freakin' weekend. 

3. Drink bubbly. HELL yah.

4. Sit on my couch and watch Netflix instant.

5. Move from my couch to my kitchen (a whole 5 feet away) for necessary snackage.

6. Call my mom a lot.

7. Call my sisters/ text my sisters a lot.

8. Tweet WAY too much. 

9. Instagram WAY too much.

10. Take a nap on said couch because I'm tired from all the snacking. 

11. Wake up all groggy and muster the energy to make a run to Walgreen's for candy.
12. Think about going on a walk or some kind of adventure.

13. Not go on any adventures. Sounds stressful.

14. Consider vacuuming.

15. Do not vacuum.

16. Make a to-do list.

17. Do nothing on previously mentioned list. 

happy Saturday,

jayteewo.

5 things I do in an interview.

1. My signature handshake: the first handshake with my interviewer, he/she extends his/her hand and I, first, with one, shaky movement raise my right hand to brush my hair out of my face and, second, bestow that same shaky hand to my colleague, as they look on, perplexed.

2. Commit to more than I'm prepared to deliver on: "Sooo.. you have managed projects like this before?" -"Oh yah, totally."

3. Not ask the questions I really want to ask.

4. Sweat: obvious. BIG problem.

5. Feel positive about the way it went, then feel nervous that I'm too confident and start feeling negative, and finally come out of the negativity and into a not quite positive but not quite negative state of reflection.


love,
jayteewo.

Things.

I can't seem to get enough fruit lately. My body must need it.

Peaches and Pineapple are my favorite fruits.

Bradley Cooper is smokin' hot.

Accessories are more important to me than clothes.

I want to be an interior decorator.

I love men with beards (have I said that before? well it deserves repeating.)

Kurt Vonnegut is one of my favorite authors.

I want a kitty (that I know I've said before).

I love lipstick.

I collect original artwork.

I would live in Denver, CO if those winters weren't such a bitch.

peace,
jayteewo.

Things.

Just because you're a dude doesn't mean you don't have to tend to your feet.
Feet in general are pretty gross.
The only people whose feet don't gross me out are those of my two sisters.
I recently switched all of my underwear and pajama-wear to all black everything.
There are two kinds of faces: one kind that looks better from the side and one that looks better head-on.
I have a head-on face.
At the age of 25 I bought my first pair of short shorts and permitted a little young tummy to peak out every now and then.
The only tweezers that work are the Tweezerman Slant.
My eyes are black.
I can do anything I set my mind to.
I don't lotion my legs enough.
Gross.
Shaving is a pain in the ass.
First chance I get, I'm goin laser.
I never let anyone go near my eyebrows.
I'm an eyebrow snob.
Coconut in ice cream is worthless if it's not toasted.
As far as eyelashes go, it's more about the curl than the length.
The only eyelash curler worth having is by Shu Umera.
I think I think Joaquin Phoenix is attractive.
I need a facial once a month.
Most estheticians are pussies.
Lately, I don't feel like drinking at all.
Well, unless it's champagne.
Thank God no one can see me when I'm home alone.
I wish I were a badass like my little sister.
She takes cool photos (see above 3).


truly,
jayteewo.